sometimes i wish that life was easy.
that there was no such thing as trouble, pain, or sorrow.
and that all was well in the world.
but today, that is not the case.
today i wake up late.
i have a headache and i'm still tired.
i just put mascara and athletic clothing on because i don't feel like getting ready.
i don't eat lunch until 1:30, and it's unhealthy at that.
i lay on my couch wrapped in a snuggie with a good movie instead of cleaning my messy room.
i fall asleep instead of reading a book i need to write an essay on.
i'm grumpy and impatient and stressed.
but.
today i also wake up with mercy from Jesus that's new every morning.
his grace is sufficient for me.
and today i remember that he carried my sin so i could live in his grace.
he received the condemnation and shame that I deserved and replaced it with righteousness.
he took the thirty-nine lashes so i wouldn't have to.
and his bruised, bloody, and beautiful body was nailed on a cross that was meant for me.
sometimes i wonder why my life is messy and things don't go as planned.
and that's when it's through the mess that Jesus reminds me that is exactly why he came.
so i don't have to do this by myself.
so i can cry and pray and tell Jesus that i'm tired of trying and i can't do it by myself.
so i can entrust him with my pain, knowing he makes beauty from ashes.
so i can remember the gospel.
that while i was yet a sinner, Christ died for me.
these broken days draw me to him and he whispers softly, "THAT is why i came for you.."
i don't have to lie in my mess and filth any longer.
i can laugh even when i've had a terrible day because my joy comes from him and not circumstances.
Jesus is good to bring me these hard days.
because that's usually when i see my desperation...
but most of all, that's usually when i see his steadfast love and grace that knows no bounds.
today i'm thankful for the hard places.
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